Monday, May 20, 2013

The Compassion of Strangers


My writers garret boasts a bay window overlooking a stand of California Redwoods, and a segment of the Russian river in the valley below, which has inspired more than one to nickname my place "Ewok Village."  Just the other morning I saw a deer calmly strolling down the road, as if this expressway through the forest had been made exclusively for her.  They are around all the time, but just the same I hold it as special whenever I manage to catch sight of one.  The lower left corner of this bay window is the favored spot for one of the smarter local spiders to construct his web.  He has figured out that since I write at night a lot of times there is never a shortage of moths hanging about, drawn in by the light.  On any given morning there are at least a couple moth corpses hanging in his gossamer net.  Working at the computer this morning, going thru emails, I couldn't help but notice the spider happily having his breakfast, as I was also enjoying mine. 

A few minutes passed when suddenly my peripheral vision caught a very quick flash of movement right in that lower left corner of the window...turning my head I was puzzled to see the web bouncing a bit with a moth carcass dangling in the breeze...but no spider.  I just stared at the sight in a minor case of cognitive dissonance as I tried to figure out what had just transpired...when a blue jay flew up from the ground and snatched the moth...exactly as it had just snatched Mr. Spider.  It seems as my lamp is feeding quite a few mouths out there...beyond the glass.  The point of it all being ... it's becoming harder and harder to make a go of things out there, if you're resorting to spiders & dead moths.

Being something of a retired hermit, (which I suppose makes me a recluse these days;) I've been watching the descent into madness gradually devolve to the current state of affairs we collectively find ourselves in*.  From the looks of things in general I'd have to say that it is also getting harder & harder to make a go of things in the world out there beyond the confines of my Redwood hideaway.  I see the signs of it more frequently as do we all but mostly I see it in the faces of the people I meet.  Increasingly I see what we vets call the thousand yard stare on the faces of so many in the general public.  It's a kind of psychic numbing which allows one to function while being traumatized by the conditions they find themselves in. These are not easy times to be sure.  We see people hoarding survival supplies, even as the government in many places has made it a crime to collect rainwater!  With each new assault against the soul of humanity, it gets harder still to retain one's sanity while navigating the daily grind and trying to prepare for a most uncertain future which some days seems so close we can smell it's foul breath on the nape of our neck. 

I tend not to write much about myself, firstly because I'm so familiar with the subject it tends to be boring and second, well that isn't what this blog is all about.  Regular readers of my work will know that I am a Vietnam veteran and that I lived in Alaska for many years.  Partially by design and partly by luck of the draw, I have enjoyed an uncommon life, which among other things includes having wolves living in my home as equals for over 30 years.  But that will have to be a story for another day.

What this blog strives to be about, is spirituality, the human condition, and trying to live our lives according to the spiritual principles we embrace.  This can be quite a struggle, especially in these troubling times.  You see; it's relatively easy to live according to spiritual principles when everything is clicking right along nice & shiny.  The more chaos, confusion and fear that is pumped into the equation, the harder it sometimes seems to be to stay centered on that spiritual path.  Things tend to pull us to one side or another, and when stuff gets really nasty we tend to circle the wagons and pack our spirituality in the closet, lest it get dirty from all the conflict...we often forget that we become spiritual beings expressly to make getting through tough times with our sanity intact, a bit easier.  For the first fifty years of this incarnation I've been blessed with extraordinarily good health, which at times (many years ago) had me thinking I was indestructible.  Over the course of the last decade or so I've seen just how foolish that notion was; as a growing list of conditions and diseases have caught up to, and are playing merry hob with me.  With patience and attention to detail, one can find a balance point with such health issues; and that is where I thought I was Just a year ago this month when things went from bad to worse, and atherosclerosis first began threatening to take my left leg from me.  The onset incident was a nightmare of unrelenting, agonizing pain; and for as bad as it was, having to deal with the quagmire of incompetence that is the VA medical system for this past year has been a far greater nightmare and risk to my health in every regard.

I'm not going to get into a ton of detail here because that just gets my dander up, which in turn ain't so good on my high blood pressure: suffice it to say that in the last year I have been an unwilling guest of the VA Medical Center in San Francisco on three occasions; and each time I went home in worse condition than when I was admitted.  The last visit was for vascular surgery last August.  My roommate was in for the same procedure as I, and because they must all be sadists, I was ignored like a fart in church while they carved this man up.  Three times they took him into surgery, and three times he came back none the better.  When this man regained consciousness he told me they had tried 3 times to insert a stint into his femoral artery, and botched the surgery each time.  When they came for me and asked if I had any questions; I said I wanted to see the surgeon who was going to work on me.  When he showed up, and asked what my questions were, I replied I just had the one.   "Did you work on my friend over there"  as I pointed to my roommate....and if so I want someone else. 

Maybe you have seen movies where patients in a hospital are just shoved aside for hours without being told a single thing.  Try waiting eight hours for an MRI scheduled for noon, and then to be manhandled into the machine by a technician not conversant in English....and who left the room completely when the MRI malfunctioned with me in it.  During the ordeal it for some reason became necessary for two of these simian technicians to extract me from the machine...from the foot end.  Despite my emphatically demanding they not pull me out by the ankles, that's exactly what they did, thereby damaging my right hip even more that it already was.  When I attempted to have said hospital employees brought under scrutiny, neither the VA or the DAV were at all interested in doing a single thing.  As I was told by one VA representative. "You should feel lucky and shut up"   Just exactly what I want to hear from the people who promised to take care of their own!

Throughout this ordeal over the past year my primary care physician at the local VA outpatient clinic has repeatedly warned that I could loose the leg, it just took me a year to finally realize what she meant was I could loose the leg thru incompetence & malpractice, which by the way there is NO OVERSIGHT for in the VA medical system.  A doctor can maim as many vets as he wants and never be held to answer for it!  Part of the reason for this is that the VAMC at San Francisco is "A teaching hospital" kinda like a barber college, where the wanna be doctors get to work on those of us who are not quite cadavers just yet.  During my vascular surgery last August, the surgeon managed to not get the stint in place, but just for extra measure he did manage to set free a roaming blood clot in my foot.  This butcher was about to wheel me out and cut into my foot looking for the blood clot, when one of the nurses suggested they try a Hesperian IV drip try and dissolve the thing.  As far as I am concerned that nurse is the only one there earning her wages, as her suggestion indeed, worked, preventing the need for unneeded surgery.  

As soon as the following morning dawned I wanted out of there, as no additional procedures were scheduled, but was over-ruled by the 'professionals'  who insisted I remain under observation in case complications arose.  I acquiesced, as my room was warm, comfortable and reasonably quiet considering I was adjacent to the OR.   I don't know why, because nobody would answer my questions, but around ten PM that night they moved my bed to another room on the other side of the wing; A cold, dark foreboding room with no heat. Twice I had to request additional blankets when the nurse got around to checking my vitals.  I told her I was freezing, and were they intentionally trying to give me pneumonia?  I made my decision that I was leaving this place at first light, one way or another.  When I made this known to the night nurse, she gathered the doctors and together they tried to convince me to stay another day.  I told them that I doubted I could survive another day in their custody, and was adamant about leaving.  Mind you that walking was being very dicey, and uncomfortable, and I was on the third floor of the building.  In a final attempt to badger me to their will, the head nurse explained that if I waited to be discharged the following day, they would wheel me to the curb in a wheelchair to meet my ride...but that if I checked myself out against doctors wishes, I could just make it downstairs on my own.  I stared right into this woman's eyes and asked, "What part of the Hippocratic oath is that little gem in, I'd love to read it."  She just averted her eyes and walked the walk of shame to get away from me.

After six months of recovering from the surgery, I asked my primary care physician if she could arrange for me to get a wheelchair, as my walking was down to about five minutes before the leg began to hurt, and having a wheelchair would allow me to have a social life beyond the confines of Ewok village.  My doctor declined, saying I needed to keep exercising the leg, or I could loose it.  Three months later I made the request thru the DAV, and my request was bounced to several different departments before finally being ignored.  They didn't even have the decency to call and tell me...just left me to figure it out myself.  This, is a 'snapshot' of how the VA cares for veterans whose claim is still pending approval despite 3 years and one appeal.  When confronted time and again by such staggering incompetence it becomes very easy to believe that the modus operandi of the Government is to stall us Vets out, until we finally die, thereby saving roughly 50 thousand bucks for every one of the 900,000 pending Veteran claims.  Do the math!

Three weeks ago I experienced a major setback, and as a result have lost all the healing and recovery made during the year since the initial onset of point of fact, due to brand new incompetence on the part of the VA medical, I am considerably worse off, and at risk of rather serious problems ahead.  Following the botched vascular surgery I was put on Warfarin blood thinning medication, which is so dangerous it requires regular testing of my blood to make sure it is within the desired INR range.  I was told at the time I would be on this medication for the rest of my life, and that if I took too much I could have a stroke, and if I took too little, I could bleed out internally & never know it till it was too late.  They succeeded in impressing upon me how important not running out of the medication is.  Well, because of the recent setback I am housebound, and was unable to make my blood check appointment.  I called to reschedule, and to re-order my meds, as I was running short.  The technician who does the INR checks informed me that she could not renew the prescription without first checking my blood level...What she didn't do was consult with my primary care physician, who is authorized to send the much needed meds.  As a result, 24 hours after running out of meds, both my feet and ankles swelled up beyond belief, complete with some rather impressive pain.

It took a week for my doctor to see me, and upon seeing the situation, she wanted to send me back to VAMC which I flatly refused to do.  I told her if it was that urgent, why send me on a 65 mile trip when there are civilian hospitals all over the local area.  I was sent to a local hospital for a complete ultrasound session on everything below the navel.  When it was done, I asked to see the scan results, and was flatly refused.  The nurse just said my doctor would have the results before the end of the day. Three days later I had to call my doctor to discover the scans showed no blood clots.  I asked her rather perturbed, why she thought it was so urgent I get the scan, but couldn't be bothered to call me with the results.  After having my ability to walk decreased to just a few agonizing steps for three weeks, I asked my doctor, the blood technician and even the civilian nurse if this swelling was caused by running out of meds.  Just like they were parroting talking points from "upstairs" every single individual gave the same response: "I don't know!"  When I challenged my primary care doctor, on this attitude, and inability to ease my extreme discomfort, she just said, "We're not gods" - to which I snapped back, "You've never been in danger of any Vets thinking that."

Like I mentioned, I dislike writing about myself, especially when I am not the focus of the post.  You may recall I began by talking about how very hard it's getting to get by these days.  We only have to scan a few headlines to see the truth of that.  Charles Dickens would never have confused the times we are in as "the Best of times" even in his wildest imaginings.  It is important to make that point as it is kinda central to what this post is really all about.  In a time when so many are busy looking out for number one, I find that I have an embarrassment of riches when it comes to friends, and perfect strangers.  Those folks who comprise my small circle of friends where I live have given selflessly to help me get thru these challenging times.  They run countless errands for me, make sure I make it to medical appointments, and even do my grocery shopping for me.  It is hard to let other people do for me when all my life I have tried to be as self sufficient as possible, perhaps to my ultimate detriment.  Astrologically I have some prominent planets in fire signs, which makes needing and accepting help from others even more difficult.

I was just coming to terms with this as best I could when strangers I've never met blindsided me recently with compassion and love I would never have imagined.  It began innocently enough with an email from Zen Gardner, asking how the leg was doing...and so, I shared with him the above details and a few others.  Several hours later I received another email from Zen, asking me if I had a PayPal account, and that I should be on alert for an email from Mr. Peak Crackers.  As it developed, Zen Gardner deposited seven hundred dollars into my PayPal account to help with living expenses or what have you, and as for Peak Crackers, well he wrote asking for a lot of personal info such as my weight, girth etc...
information he said he needed for purchasing an electric wheel chair for me!!

Edna Spennato at earth-heal. is another loving co-conspirator of compassion.  Edna has done distant healing work on me previously, which was a big part of recovering from the surgery as well, and just today I got a message from her inquiring about my status, and to say she sends her thoughts & love my way. 

I write a lot about Unity, and unconditional love being the frequency resonance we need to embody here at the dawn of the Aquarian age.  I just thought I knew what those concepts were like, in the abstract.  In the here & now of what we call the real world, or real life, when unity & unconditional love stroll into your life and tap you on the shoulder; it is altogether different from any abstraction the human mind can imagine.

Here are perfect strangers, coming together to help one they have never met get thru a rough patch of challenges. 

How easy would it be to just remain quiet, to keep one's own counsel, and tend to one's own problems.

How many would invoke the universal law of non-infringement to justify non-involvement? 

This handful of people are teaching us all that compassion & unconditional love are not just for those we personally know and have come to care for.  By their actions, and generosity these people are as trailblazers; showing us all that unconditional love and unity are not just heady new age abstractions; but indeed, are the very energies that can lead the tribe of man homeward, if we will but pay attention, and try it on for size ourselves.

This spontaneous out flowing of compassion and unconditional love has touched my heart in a way that is hard to describe with mere words.  It cuts thru words, sentences and phrases as if they are impediments to understanding the energy at the heart of things.  It is something you need to just sit with, and be with.  Peak Crackers said something that really speaks to this issue when he wrote that it was hard feeling so helpless when a brother was hurting and in need.  Those were not just handy words, as I believe his discomfort was both authentic and tangible.

Looking around at the condition the human condition is in, it's so tempting to think our best days are behind us, that the archons and their sycophants have succeeded in toxifying the human soul beyond any feasible redemption.  That is a trap, and it's exactly what "they" want us all to empowers their plans for us.  When I see this kind of pure compassion for another living being, it makes me smile.  When I am the recipient of such compassion it makes my soul shine as if being re-born somehow, and I know it is a harbinger of still larger wonders to come.

Take a really good look around.  Look beyond the headlines designed to heighten your fear and anxiety. Look to the things that aren't being reported on but which can be seen by those who look with the right kind of eyes.  You will see things like the younger generation turning their backs on guns, and violence.  You will see a dying paradigm of rich old white men in it's death throes.  Those old dinosaurs are dying out even as we watch, their system all but collapsed in around them.  It won't be long now.

How do I know this?  Because if such selfless compassion can find me hiding out in Ewok village, that means it is on the wing, and covering the earth with its resonance.  You don't need to go searching for it; you just need to be open to receiving it. 

Compassion and unconditional love will sneak up and tap you on the shoulder when you least expect it; and when it does; it will change you in ways that you never suspected, as it has changed me.

Until Next Time ~ Be Good to Each Other


  1. Oh Chautauqua, how beautifully written. You have made my soul shine this morning.

  2. Likes attract likes.
    Thank you for sharing.

    Journey well,

  3. Hi Chautauqua.
    Very good commune thoughts and feelings with you again.
    Although I do not comment on each of your posts, does not mean I do not have read and learned from their sincere intentions.
    You know, I met Stuart Wilde through the link of your blog and how you should realize, despite the short time between meet him, lose him so suddenly was a shock to me.
    I was rehearsing send him a message describing how I enjoyed his lessons of wisdom, and without warning (as if these events give warnings!) Had no more chance to thank him in life.
    I was discouraged some days.
    So today, realizing that there was a new post your, I thought to myself, I will not miss any chance likely to demonstrate to my new friend Chautauqua, as I appreciate and am thankful for him sharing his wisdom, experience and talent.
    These small pieces of sincere thoughts and perceptions, based on rich experience of life you gives us from time to time, are exactly the way they grace us with their unconditional love and compassion.
    Compassion, humility, sincerity and unconditional love can be packaged in various types of packages, but do not stop being what they are for it.
    And I am very grateful to have had the honor to tell you that.
    If it is not possible personally, physically, yet it is in a direct manner and clear through your blog.
    At the same time I feel the physical pain you've been experiencing and estimating its improvement, I am sending you with all my heart my thanks and sincere desire and hope of a complete recovery as soon as possible.
    With great affection.

  4. Wander my friend, you might just know what a powerful effect your words have upon me, after writing such a beautiful and heartfelt message how could you not! We are all connected on the medicine wheel of, me, everybody connected to each other. We could see that if we could just see energy. As my good friend Mr. Peak Crackers says "Top Left" to you sir <> Peaceful blessings.

  5. PS Wander: "top left, where the heart is, where I keep thoughts of you. Love Ya, C

  6. Dearest Chautauqua: (This is Althea). I was so worried about you. For days I wondered, where is Chautauqua, what's happening, especially as we have so recently connected via your site. My heart is with you, I send my love and high positive energy that you will be physically well soon. There is certainly nothing wrong with your heart and that is most important. I'm sure you know this, but Apple Cider Vinegar is a wonderful blood thinner. Your ordeal at the VA hospital was horrific, but I am sorry to say, not surprising. I picture you always safe at Ewok Village. I lived in the wilderness for a few years and one full moon night, I was standing at the kitchen sink, which overlooked the road near our house. Meandering up the right side of the road were two bears, and trotting along coming towards the bears were three deer. None stopped, but all acknowledged each other. I'll never forget it as I'm sure you'll never forget Alaska. So looking forward to your wolves story, but take care of you first. We're here for you and if there is anything I can do from British Columbia, please tell me and I will do it. And thank you Zen and Peak C's for your wide-open hearts. Always love to you, my dear Star Brother, A.

  7. I would not exist here anymore, had it not been for the kindness of strangers in my past. Thankful beyond words. Yup, really helps us see the true beauty of humanity when we get to experience it first hand. The tv lies. A lot of us still hold some goodness... even if we have our own issues to deal with. Which is why I try to pay it forward as much as possible. Love to you, and all the kind, crazy awesome souls that flock here. :)

  8. G'Morning REB~
    As I am experiencing this wondrous expression of unity towards me; I cannot help but send my heart out to the folks in Moore, Oklahoma following the devastating tornado there. Nobody should have to search for their child in the wreckage of a school. It makes me that much more grateful for all the energy folks are sending me during my medical adventures. Deeply felt gratitude here for your words and sentiment this morning...more coffee for you?

  9. Oh man, my heart is with those people, this morning. So sad. My area of GA was hit by a bad tornado a couple years ago, which we are still recovering from... Not nice at all. My heart is with them, and with YOU, with all you are going through. My dad was in the Navy, so I've heard plenty of VA stories in my life. Thankfully, others have reached out. Yay, for kind people, and loving hearts! ....and thank you, yes, I will have some more coffee. Mmmm, tastes like the stuff I used to get in the Pac NW... sigh.

  10. Starbucks and Bagels on a drizzly Thursday morning at fisherman market :)

    1. :) That's the stuff, right there. A short walk up from the ferry *waves goodbye to the seals*

  11. Hello.
    I want to enjoy this incredible vibrating space if my friend Chautauqua allow me to send my sincere condolences and prayers to all of you Americans, the tragedy of these tornadoes.
    Here in Brazil we do not have these types of extreme natural phenomena, then our tragedies are otherwise, are caused by greed, envy, lack of empathy and love for human beings corrupt and sick.
    Do not stop being human tragedies, but our energy has a more malevolent.
    Mother nature needs to re-balance from time to time and unfortunately sometimes some of their children are on the way.
    What to say? I'm sorry, I'll be praying for their fellow citizens.

  12. Wander~
    First of all I hope you will at all times feel welcome and encouraged to post whatever you so desire on this site. In times of tragedy such as the Oklahoma tornado is all the evidence we need that We Are One. Souls from all over earth send their emotions of care love and loss to those affected. It kinda hits me in a nostalgic place because I grew up in Moore Oklahoma many moons ago; and even though I left, there are still those I know and hope the best for living there. This tornado took the same exact path thru Moore Oklahoma as the May 3, 1999 EF-5 tornado, which was the highest wind speed ever recorded for a tornado (303 mph), Perhaps they should consider making that whole strip of land a memorial park, instead of rebuilding in the same spot.

  13. * Hope you feel some 'light/love' EM frequencies from source-> searching you out & slipping thru the veil of the matrix, that's holding you transfixed, as a temporary gravity angel...within the oft time painful constraints, of this 3-D matter construct.
    ...I live on a shoestring myself, with just one disability check between me & real hardship at any given time...Thankfully I live in Canada, were the social programs haven't been entirely dismantled ...YET... by our Fundamentalist Christian Zionist Conservative Prime Minister-(Israel-first clone)->Stephen Harper (a zion poodle)
    ...I've suffered long & heavily from PTSD, from protracted childhood abuse(by an insane narcissist father) which manifested into years of alcoholism/depression from the deleterious effects of the multi-level/vicious circles, of archon abuse; & quite frankly... it's only because I believe that I'm an 'old soul' with an eternal spiritual awareness & a reason, for the simple fact, that I'm not Dead or in Jail & successfully recovered for almost 10 years...& awoken again!
    ...This is all to empathize & help you share the pain of life's little 'shit sandwiches' that get placed in front of us to deal with & always at the worst possible times, it seems...good ol`Murphy
    ...Even tho I'm free to get up & walk...I find it hard to get out of my chair...'one thing you can't hide when you're crippled inside'...but it's knowing we're not all alone, as within our evolving virtual community, does it make the pain a little easier to bear...So cheers amigo...Hope you're feeling & receiving some good vibes to morph your reality into a more peaceful equilibrium.

  14. My brother from another mother, Alex~
    How I do enjoy your way with words, and your moral support is most well received; and right you are...the in-streaming "Good Vibrations" are such that not only has my overall condition & disposition improved...we are now contracting to construct an air traffic control tower up in here just to handle all the energy healers alone, quite something to behold...and very humbling at same time. Blessings and cheers brother!

  15. yeah. i know that stare. ive gazed off into that distance.had many comrades didnt make the journey back from that thousand yard distance. i came back from that place. arms around you brother warrior. we have seen things not many can speak of. the mists of war have faded into the fog of memories, now, yet i still see the stripes on my old company commanders arm. kill a commie for christ. all i am left with, is the memories of cognitive dissonance, and the stench of death. what did we die for? you brought back thoughts i hadnt recognized in a long time, chautauqua. bittersweet.tears of gratitude. for the love of comradeship and brotherhood. for those that didnt make it back.

  16. Z.Shaman; Indeed brother~ the lessons were worth learning, but I can't recommend the course at all! What did we die for ~ well to put an end to war, of course. Thanks, see ya on the beach.

  17. My dear sweet baby. I feel strong physical and psychic pain for you...and all veterans caught up in the pure incompetence of "government help". It sickens me how the very people that defend this nation are cast aside like trash when they are no longer deemed useful (shame on you for not dying for your beloved country like a good little warrior). I live with a Seabee VV (and retired cop) that is 24 years my senior. He is living on borrowed time, not outwardly suffering from any physical ailments but, wrestles with alcoholism (in denial of such) and PTSD. He does not like doctors and, as such, has never even set foot in a VA facility...and we live within minutes of the "famed" Durham "teaching" hospital, across the street from Duke. I don't blame him. Stories abound from that place as the VA "experiments" on veterans for the sake of Duke's research.

    I am newly awakened. Looking back, my spiritual awareness started gradually after a minor vehicle accident (that should have been much worse) in the mountains of Colorado. There was an intervention and I'm still alive. My life has changed drastically since then.

    On my birthday (Aug. 30) of last year, I got a reading from an Akashic Records reader (Mona Wind ~ after hearing her interview on Coast to Coast AM. I'm pretty sure that you know that that's what Edgar Cayce could do. I freaked out over the information she provided me and it took months for me to digest everything. I'm still working thru learning that I am a powerful healer (for people and the planet, apparently). After some careful research, I'm a newbie Lightworker, although I'm still pondering exactly what I'm supposed to do. The Archons in the "big squeeze" ( make it truly difficult to meditate and learn more without the interference. I understand that all of us Lightworkers are under attack to one degree or another because of their desperate attempt to control us (knowledge of their existence is a powerful thing but, dangerous as well).

    I've said all that to say this...I can't send you any money to help. I've been unemployed for two years, now (I'm a poor computer geek with outdated skills and no degree; I'm lucky that my VV is a kind soul). I can't help you with errands or cook for you as I am WAY on the other side of the country from you. But, despite Archon interference and novice ability, I will be sending you healing light and energy. I'm starting to get the hang of pulling Galactic Center light and redirecting it.

    I just recently found your blog thru and I love your posts. As an older light warrior, I've been drawing guidance from you. You are quite the beacon out here.

    I've been sending little bursts of energy to Oklahoma but, I have to be careful. There's so much destruction and pain that it can be draining (been sleeping a LOT this week).

    You are loved, sweetheart. I can feel you 3000 miles away. You are stronger than you think you are. I'm just a 46 year old pup.

    Love & Light

  18. ~Lea~
    Thank you so much for sharing this information, you and your VV are most fortunate to have each other. I am going to enjoy checking out the links you shared, they look quite interesting to say the least. Dear sister, do not fret over inability to send money, like it says in Romans 12, "To each according to their gifts". Regards the sending of healing energy, I am currently in the hands of two different international distant energy healers, and as such have had to establish a sort of 'air traffic control system' up in here. During the day I am well is however during the wee hours of the morning when the pain denies me sleep that I could use an extra burst or two of good old white light. If you are feeling motivated to assist in this fashion, that is when I need it the most. Deep thanks.


  19. Try going to the oneness university site and getting some deeksha!

  20. Thanks, but not my cup of tea!

  21. I shall do my level best, although, overlapping, simultaneous white light and energy is not a bad thing. That said, I suppose it's a good idea not to have healers tripping over each other.

    I hope that you might entertain the idea of a holistic, local healer to assist. Many naturopaths can bill on sliding scales knowing today's economy. They aren't slaves to the insurance monsters and can usually cut their rates (the true healers...not the ones that call themselves naturopaths but, conduct themselves as allopaths). A good deal of healing can take place with organic nutrition, herbs and spices (hence why I cook a lot).

    Here's some information to get you started (I know I'm assuming a lot here, like, you don't already know this but, here I go...):
    The Wheat Monster:
    Anti-inflammatory Turmeric:
    Pomegranate & atherosclerosis:


    Love & Light